February 6, 2024
By Machelle McDowell
Proverbs 17:17- A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. This verse means that a true friend will love you no matter what, but when bad times come, they become as close as a brother or sister.
(We can learn much about how to be a good friend from the book of Proverbs.)
Back in the 80’s Michael W. Smith wrote a song that was popular among the youth around the world. The chorus spoke these words- Friends are Friends Forever (if) the Lord is Lord of them. There is so much truth in this thought. Everyone desires to have a true friend.
This week as we dive deeper into the life of Job, we meet his friends, Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar. I find it interesting that we spend 21 chapters listening to Job & his friends discuss his situation? Doesn’t it make you wonder why such emphasis was placed on Job’s friends?
At first, Job’s friends seem to be super thoughtful! They get together and decide to go as a group and sit with their friend. Job ch. 2 tells us they cried, they empathized, they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. They spent time with him! They sat at his side for (7) days and didn’t say a word. They were just there for him! And then, the silence was broken.
Why do think we have to give our opinion on matters in which we know nothing about? Why do we spend 21 chapters listening to Job & his friends discuss his situation? All manner of this discussion is based on opinion and human perspective.
Proverbs 27:9- A sweet friendship refreshes the soul. Well, that verse applies to Job’s friends at the beginning of the book. But, something starts to happen~
There is something to be said about friends influencing each other through constructive criticism. Job’s friends take Proverbs 27:17 to a whole new level- “Iron sharpens iron so one person sharpens another.”
It is our responsibility as friends to hold each other accountable. But, that does not mean we put ourselves in the place of God and speak for Him in a manner unworthy. Job’s friends were convinced that Job was suffering because he had done something wrong. They pleaded with him to repent so God would bless him again. They accused him and belittled him.
Now granted, there is some wisdom in their advice if it were the real reason for this trial Job was placed in. But, as the story unfolds we learn it is far from why Job is suffering. The sweet behavior of Job’s friends at the beginning of the chapter de-escalates to a bitter attack on his character and added to his suffering instead of refreshing him!
The only iron being sharpened was the ones being used to stab Job with insults and untruths that hurt more than his diseased body was already hurting.
Sometimes God allows Satan to use our own friends as vessels in times of trial and tribulation. Unfortunately they may not be used in a good way. They may be more of a discourager than an encourager as in the case with Job.
A smart tactic on the part of the enemy because we trust our true friends. We value their input. And (after all we are human) we all can be led astray at times, especially by our friends.
I feel like that is what happened with Job’s friends in this book. They had a weak moment in which they were unknowingly caught up in the enemy’s plan and when one spoke… a snowball effect took over and the next thing you know, an avalanche of condemnation occurred.
God sends a man of reason to the scene:
We certainly should not bring judgement on someone based on assumption.
I am assuming this is why Elihu shows up in chapter 32. He is also a friend but not one of the 3 who came to comfort Job in the beginning of the book.
He not only lifts up the Lord but condemns Job’s 3 friends for their behavior and confronts Job about his behavior in all of this as well.
I love that Elihu deals with the the situation through Godly wisdom and not from a human perspective. He respectively addresses all parties and acts like a good friend!
I love how God stands up for Job in chapter 42! He addresses his anger towards Job’s friends because they did not speak with wisdom in that they voiced their own selfish thoughts and did not speak the truth.
In looking at chapter 42, God rebukes Job’s friends and instructs them to repent. Then, a beautiful reconciliation takes place in Job 42:10 “The Lord restores the fortunes of Job when Job had prayed for his friends and the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.”
Job forgives his friends! His true heart reflects God in that he modeled how we must forgive others as the Lord has forgiven us.
Maybe there have been times you did not give the most Godly advise to a friend and leaned on your own human opinion. I am guilty, you?
We can learn a lot about being a good friend in a time of suffering in the book of Job. Sometimes, our physical presence is all that is needed.
“There are friends, there is family, and then there are friends that become family.” (Anonymous)