I’m going to give you an honest, inside look at some of my thought life that is more recurring than I’m proud to admit:
“I know these things are wrong that I’m being tempted with. It’s obvious. But why in the world is the desire so strong to do something I know is SO not right in God’s eyes?”
Would it be too much to say that some days, it seems like there’s two versions of ourselves: the man (or woman) that desires to follow and obey the words of our Lord, and then another “version” of ourselves that almost burns with desire to sin. Too extreme? Probably not, if we’re honest.
Paul describes this very struggle in the book of Romans. In Romans 7:15, he states, '“For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” Later in verse 24, Paul calls himself “wretched” as a result of this struggle. And a lot of the time, that’s where we find ourselves. And that’s where we stop, as if we’ve ran into an immoveable wall of shame. Stuck. And we can easily stay in this vicious cycle of feeling defeated, making us feel isolated from our families, our fellow Christians, and even God Himself.
That’s what shame does. It makes us feel alone and distant. It’s not the same as guilt. Healthy guilt, or conviction, is a gut check that tells us we’ve sinned. Shame, however tells us that because we’ve sinned, something is wrong with us that isn’t wrong with anybody else. It tells us that we’re unlovable.
It tempts us to hide.
In Genesis 3, we see this play out for the first time in history. Eve was deceived into believing she misunderstood God’s commands concerning the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. She was convinced that something she understood to be forbidden was actually good for her. Sound familiar? That’s how temptation works. When she and Adam ate that forbidden fruit, we are told in Genesis 3:7, “… their eyes were opened and they knew they were naked.” Then they hid from God. Or we should say, they tried to hide.
In verse 9, God called out to Adam, “Where are you?” Such powerful words from our father God! Since we know our God is all knowing and all powerful, with nothing in thought or deed able to be hidden from Him, we see Him offering this invitation to Adam and Eve. His asking, “Where are you?” was just that. An invitation to come to Him in honesty. To confess our sin. To be free from guilt. To destroy shame.
Is this you today? It has definitely been me. To prevent shame from taking its hold on us, we must accept the invitation given to us by God today. “Where are you?” Go to him, Christian. Stop hiding. He is waiting.
In Romans 7 where we started today, Paul doesn’t leave us hanging. He knows the solution to his struggle. “Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord!” From there, Paul gives us one of the most powerful chapters in the New Testament, which begins with “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Jesus Christ.” Amen and Amen!
Now, go read the rest of Romans 8.
And stop hiding.
-Brandon Walker,
South Fork Church